I am someone you have to meet.
I want that last sentence to sound like a promo for an FX TV series.
I think. Actually I don’t remember back that far.
Some sentence here was supposed to mean something.
And I wasn’t supposed to start a new paragraph but I just did.
Blah blah blah.
I just felt like doing that.
Alright now I’m on the moon. Now I’m running around in circles at the edge of a crater. Now I’m playing golf. Now I’m talking about small steps and mankind.
Someone wanted to know the origins of a joke appearing in my stand-up — the one about a British cousin who picks up on girls. Actually that joke is based on a number of events.
I really do have a British cousin. He’s two years older than I. When he visits, girls love him. He never says, “I’ve got a big long motorcar and I want to park it in your garage.” Actually he’s funny and cool, and I love him too. But the accent is part of the charm, no doubt. When during High School my cousin lived here for one year, I witnessed a lot of girls loving him.
Also, once I visited my good friends Guy and Heidi in Belgium. It was a great trip, but as a foreigner I had a very different experience than my cousin with members of the opposite sex. The girls were generally not into me at all. I don’t mean they were turned off because I was acting obnoxious. I mean they were pissed off when I merely ordered a cup of coffee at the cafe they worked at. As an American, that’s a climate I’ve experienced in England, the Netherlands, and elsewhere in Europe. So, just for laughs I made up an extremely American mock pick-up line: “How’d y’all feel about cheap beer, four-wheel drive, and semi-automatic weapons?”
I really did say that to a few girls. They looked at me like I were crazy, and they were probably right.
Anyways, that’s where that joke comes from.
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