More punchlines.
Entries Tagged as 'Humor'
I’m the Fuckin Computer Scientist, Dumbass: Long Beach Open-Mic Stand-Up November 4th 2009
November 5th, 2009 · 4 Comments · Humor, Video
Tags: stand-up
Underneath The British Big Long Motorcar Joke
October 16th, 2009 · No Comments · Humor, Travel
I am someone you have to meet.
I want that last sentence to sound like a promo for an FX TV series.
I think. Actually I don’t remember back that far.
Some sentence here was supposed to mean something.
And I wasn’t supposed to start a new paragraph but I just did.
Blah blah blah.
I just felt like [...]
Tags:
K-WAVE Kowboy
July 4th, 2009 · 3 Comments · Humor
One radio station I go back to again and again is a SoCal Christian station, K-WAVE. I’d listen to the Buddhist station, but there ain’t one. Well, not in English. I’d listen to the Jewish station but there ain’t one of those either. Well, other than NPR — but I can only tolerate one story [...]
Tags: socal living
For All You Procrastinators Out There
May 14th, 2009 · 5 Comments · Humor
Below are pictures of the “Mother’s Day card” I gave to my mom.
I didn’t get back from Vegas until late last Sunday night. On Monday I couldn’t find a Mother’s Day card for sale anywhere.
My poor mom actually thought it was hilarious.
Tags: mom
Coffee or Tea
April 8th, 2009 · 9 Comments · Favorites, Humor, Memoirs, Personal
I must be the only one in my family who drinks coffee. Well, my father drinks coffee. But he’s not really, “in my family.” He’s just my dad — an extreme individualist who lives in the mecca for such people, Los Angeles.
My mother inherited her drinking habits from her own mother, who is British. So, [...]
WARNING: Taking the following three in combination might cause you to blow your head off.
April 2nd, 2009 · 2 Comments · Humor, Uncategorized
I received an absolutely horrible email this morning. Or horrifying. Maybe that’s a better way of putting it: horrifying.
subject: Whole Foods E-waste and Donation Event on Saturday
Dear Ian,
This Saturday, Goodwill, Energy 92.7 Radio and Whole Foods Market have teamed up to make donating easy, fun and delicious. Visit us at the San Mateo Whole Foods [...]
Tags: san francisco·san mateo
It’s Friday at COB and I have Absolutely Nothing to Contribute to the World
March 20th, 2009 · 2 Comments · Favorites, Humor
Oh, except that COB means “Close of Business,” for those of you who didn’t know.
Oh, and the below video.
As far as contributions go, this video is a rather minimal one.
Viewing it you may think to yourself either
A) This is not funny.
or
B) This is funny, but not for any intelligent reason.
I hope it’s B.
Tags: masturbation
Uh. Well. In That Case I’d Leave. After Filming It.
March 13th, 2009 · 3 Comments · Humor, Reviews
Ross got me one of those sweet Flip Video cameras for my birthday.
I figured the best way to thank the man was to sneak into his room late at night and freak him out with my skeleton mask. Unfortunately, he wasn’t asleep.
One thing the camera does quite well is film in low light.
Tags: flip mino hd
Modern Martyr of Free Enterprise
March 10th, 2009 · 3 Comments · Humor
IF IT FEELS GOOD DO IT OFFICIAL SELF SACRIFICE AWARD
Name: Unknown.
Occupation: Cocaine Smuggler.
Manifestation of Martyrdom: Boldly attempted to smuggle two pound “cast” made entirely of cocaine through airport customs.
Manifestation of Self Sacrifice: Broke leg to ensure cast appeared ordinary in the event of a spontaneous x-ray.
Evidence of Ingenuity: Went where no cocaine smuggler had gone [...]
Tags: cocaine
A New And Cheaper Way — To Look Just As Good
March 3rd, 2009 · 6 Comments · Humor, Memoirs
Recently I was admonished by a someone I know and love. Severely. And she used to know and love me. Now she just knows me. Well, barely.
She used to be one of my biggest fans. “Ha ha your blog is so funny!” she’d say.
Now she said, “You are so full of yourself and that [...]
Tags: haircut