If It Feels Good Do It

The rendezvous began with hot, passionate sex. Or at least it was hot. Like, the air conditioner didn’t work or something. I think it was passionate sex. I’m a guy so there really is not much difference between passionate sex, dispassionate sex, healthy sex, good sex, unhealthy sex, bad sex, dirty sex, clean sex, [...]

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Every so often, something happens that makes me say nothing. Or wait, it makes me say something. It makes me say, “Who the fuck cares?” But politicians and the media will go into a frenzy over it.
In 2004 this thing was Janet Jackson’s nipple popping out during the Superbowl halftime show. It was a non-event. [...]

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I see a lot more daytime television talk shows now, usually when I’m eating something.
The shows in the morning all all have time time related names, like “Good Morning America,” or “Early Show.”
Later in the day the shows are named after the hosts. None of the shows have time related names. “The Afternoon Show” [...]

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Look at these Proposition 8 results by county.
What’s up with Los Angeles and San Diego? Fuck those guys. We should ban face-lifts, breast implants, and marriage between fake people. Then no one in Southern California could get married. They’d all be wrinkled and flat, too.
But in fairness the only county in the bay area that [...]

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I can not help but make some remarks on the election results.
Last night on television, I saw the faces of my countrymen moved to tears by the sight of president-elect Obama. There were no cameras on me, but I was also.
Actually, I have liked McCain for years. In different circumstances, I might have voted for [...]

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DIEGO: I know they are not pure. Nor am I, for that matter. After all I was born among them, and I live for my city and my age.
THE PLAGUE: An age of slaves.
DIEGO: No, the age of free men.
THE PLAGUE: Free men? You amaze me. I can’t see any here. Where are they?
DIEGO: In [...]

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I remember once in the 80s, my dad brought home this new invention known as the answering machine. He obsessed over creating the perfect greeting with background music. One thing he had to emphasize was to speak AFTER the tone. Some people would just start leaving their message once they heard “please leave me a [...]

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Default employer of boring guys: Google.
God damn guys that work at Google are boring. Don’t tell my ex-girlfriend I said that. Just kidding, you can tell her. She works at Google so of course she knows it.
Default things that guys that work at Google want to talk about:

Google.
Googlers
Being Googly.

I hate how at Google they have [...]

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People sometimes tell me I’m crazy. Alright, not sometimes. Just about everyday someone says to me “Ian, you’re crazy.” They want to know why I do the things I do. Sometimes it’s like they’re saying to themselves “What? You can’t do that! You can’t say that!”
You can.
America is supposed to be a free country, isn’t [...]

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Default vehicle for the liberal elite: Toyota Prius.
Default thing requiring self-sacrifice that a member of the liberal elite does to help the world: absolutely nothing.
Default manifestation of doing absolutely nothing performed by a member of the liberal elite: Placing a “No Blood For Oil” bumper sticker on a Toyota Prius. Close runner up: Placing an [...]

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